How 36 Seconds Can Change Everything

Our brains are strange.

And too self-limiting at times.

We’re truly our own worst enemies.

We tell ourselves we need giant-sized supplies of confidence first. That we need to feel ready before we act.

But we don’t.

All it really takes is 36 uncomfortable seconds (I totally made that number up. It’s probably even less.).

36 seconds to say the thing you’ve been avoiding.
36 seconds to take space in rooms that usually overlook you.
36 seconds to ask the question that makes your stomach drop.

But we rarely do it. Why? Certainly not because we can’t.

But because we make mountains out of molehills.

We imagine disaster before it happens. We rehearse the worst-case scenario in vivid f*cking HD.

We convince ourselves that one conversation could ruin everything.

And in doing so, we hand our little friend “fear” all the power it doesn’t deserve.

The Problem

You do it every day.

You frame a 36-second problem like it’s a 36-day war.

You overestimate the cost of being brave and underestimate the cost of staying small.

You picture the fallout: the awkward silence, the disapproval, the rejection, the broken relationships.

But what you don’t account for is the missed opportunities.

The growth that comes with being courageous for just a micro-moment.

And ultimately, you overlook the slow erosion of your credibility every time you hold back.

My friend, the problem isn’t fear itself.

It’s the story you tell around it.

And that’s what will keep you exactly where you are.

Unless you do this:

Power Move I: Ask for the Promotion

Pick one opportunity or role you’ve been hesitating to ask for and do it. Do it this week.

Don’t f*cking wait.

1-2 sentences max: “Hey, I’ve been meaning to ask you what it would take for me to become a Director here. That’s where I want to be in the next 2-3 years.”

Or if the job is posted somewhere, apply.

You’ll feel the heat rise in your chest.

It’s normal. That’s courage right there. Not danger.

Power Move II: Make Courage Micro

Don’t wait for the “big talk.” Practice in really tiny reps.

Give feedback in one sentence instead of a full email or report.

Ask one clarifying question instead of a long challenge.

Each micro-act trains your nervous system that it’s safe to speak up.

Power Move III: Address The Hard Sh*t

The hardest part of any tough conversation is starting it.

Again, prep your first line in advance. You’ll feel so much better.

“I wanted to circle back on something that’s been on my mind about your recent performance.”

Once you say it, momentum takes over.

If you do this, you’re ahead of like 99% of leaders (most of them suck at this).

(When you finally decide to take that 36-second leap, don’t freeze on the words. Grab my completely free guide Small Talk Scripts for Smart People.)

Bonus Power Move: Step Into the Space You Deserve

When you’re in a big meeting and have something to say, count down from three and then go for it.

That’s your 36-second window. Don’t overthink it.

Say what needs to be said before your brain talks you out of it.

Closing Thoughts

We think courage is a permanent trait.

It’s not. It’s a pulse. A flash. A short burst of energy.

You don’t need to be brave all the damn time.

You just need to be brave for 36 seconds at a time.

The next time something feels impossible, ask yourself if it’s truly that big. Or if you’ve just given it too much f*cking power.

Because most turning points in your career (and in life) don’t require bravery that lasts forever.

Just 36 seconds.

That’s all it takes to move your story forward.

Happy Saturday,

Alain H.

P.S. If you're ready to bring courage into your next 1:1, download the free 1:1 Manager Scripts to get some lines that help you speak up and lead clearly.